“Good boys don’t wear earrings”
“Boys from good families don’t wear earrings,” I was told by my mum several years ago. I was determined to get my ears pierced, and my parents were equally determined not to let me. One day, while my family was watching an episode of the Mahabharata on TV, something struck me, that had slipped my notice up until then. Virtually all of the male characters had earrings, including the revered Shri Krishna. “Ha-ha,” I thought to myself, lets see how they argue against this one.
June 20th, 2006 at 10:36 pm
Dear Pranava ji, I hardly need to state that you are free to do what you like: “It is none of my business”.
However, if we take a different approach, I would be more concerned with the “why” of anyone being inclined to ‘wear earrings’ or of deciding on any action. I would request that we examine the issue more objectively and more generally:
(1) Are we using the episode of the Mahabharata on TV as a reason or justification to ‘conforming’ to a trend which we have accepted anyway?
Are we seeking confirmation here? (2) Why do we depend on our parents when they get confused and are not able to answer a question? Can we not conduct the enquiry independently? (3) How do you know that the Pandavas and Shri Krishna had the same reasons for wearing the earrings as you? Did you go into the customs of those times of history?
(4) Is it good enough for us to do something merely because somebody is shown doing it?
There are many more such questions which set us thinking.
I am interested in knowing more about the “how” and “why” of such decisions, in a dispassionate way– without the involvement of feeling and emotion or prejudice. This is because such enquiry will help one generation understand the previous as well as the next generation better.
Thank you for your time,
Haresh.
June 21st, 2006 at 12:12 pm
Yes U shaw Krishna and others wearing earings…..The problem is U ONLY shaw the earing……..did you notice their other clothings? Did u realise the era?
U want to wear jeans and earings in this era? what are u, any way? or do u want to do anything just in the name of liberty and human rights?
June 21st, 2006 at 2:35 pm
Congratulations on winning this Mahabharat war against your mom, my dear Pranav! I enjoyed reading your article! Now that victory is declared, I would like to offer a couple of comments.
(a) Getting the ears pierced or not getting them pierced, wearing ear studs or rings, etc is a matter of prevalent culture. My mom used to wear a nose stud. If you look around you in UK (or USA, where I live), almost no woman wears them now. I always thought nose studs looked cute on women, as long as they are really small. But if my daughter (an imaginary one, I have two boys) asked to have her nose pierced, I would advise her not do it because, you know, she would want to belong. While at Rome, it helps to do as a Roman does. The objectives in life should be to follow Dharmic principles, achieve one’s Arthic objectives and have fun at the same time. As long as your potential employer does not refuse to give you your dream job, no one beats you up because they think you look like a punk and your girlfriend/wife has no problems with it, you can have both sides of your nose pierced too.
(b) If you look at the ear lobes of Hindu men from India, you will find out that a vast majority of men had their ears pierced when they were kids. I had mine pierced too, rather against my will. I have a very hazy recollection of my dad taking me to a jeweler to have it done when I was very little. It was customary for Hindus, in particular Brahmins, to have ears pierced and if possible, wear studs. Getting the ears pierced is one of the Hindu ’samskaras’.
Thanks.
Rajashekhar Shivaram Sharma
June 21st, 2006 at 4:57 pm
slightly similar to the previous comment, yet somewhat less eloquent, how do you know that the panadavas and krishna and so on wore earrings for the same purpose as you? surely the majority of people that get their ears pierced dont do it for the health benefits..
June 21st, 2006 at 8:14 pm
I agree with Mr. Sharma .I had mine pierced at the time of thread ceemony (Yagopavita) and wore ear rings for almost a year.I was told that it is religiously important to wear and I did that. However I have a feeling that if I wear the rings and go for a job interview now then the chances of rejection will be high.
June 21st, 2006 at 8:20 pm
“Yes U shaw Krishna and others wearing earings…..The problem is U ONLY shaw the earing……..did you notice their other clothings? Did u realise the era?
U want to wear jeans and earings in this era? what are u, any way? or do u want to do anything just in the name of liberty and human rights?”
Actually ear rings are worn even in this era by men in the villages of India so you talking about era’s is rubbish, so I guess in some people’s minds many village men in India are badboys/gangsta’s just cuz they wear ear rings. The real things that should be looked at is whether the person having his ears pierced is doing it for conformity or if he has genuine respect for one of the Hindu samskaras (piercing one’s ears).
June 21st, 2006 at 9:37 pm
Dear Haresh Bakshi
I don’t think u read the article properly. The last paragraph says:
“I’m not trying to say that because our male ancestors wore earrings we all should. What I want to ask is where has our fickle, somewhat close-minded attitude to an individual’s style come from? What sanction do these notions of ‘respectability’ have?”
So I’m NOT sayin that everybody shuld go around doing exactly what our great ancestors did. I’m saying that: why are Hindus pressured conform to the fickle and fake ’standards of respectibility’ that the contemporary samaj has set in terms of dress and style, even more so when these standards of respectibility have NO SANCTION in Hindu traditions.
I mean isn’t it ironic that young Hindus are often told that you look like a “rudeboy” if you get an earring done when our reverred deities also had earrings?
June 30th, 2006 at 2:05 am
when we understand the body is an adornment, is not its adonrment merely Maya? This is the basis of fickleness of our notions of style. We certainly acquired a great deal of Vicotrian influence as to a “propper” family, etc. The hero’s were born with adornements. To glorify the body is itself not a fault. To stop there is. Thence we adorn our bodies with cloathes and behaviors and martial arts, and ribbons and speach, and internets…. Body keep reaching and thanks for your sense of humor. You still have to live with your family though. Good Luck!
July 18th, 2006 at 8:26 pm
I may be wrong but I think both Men and Women used to wear earings in India as some thought there were health benefits associated with it, I don’t actually know what they are and as I said I may be wrong.
I think it is fair to say that no research in recent times has supported the claim.
What people have to remember is the customs and attitudes in the country the individual lives in. I think somebody touched on it earlier but most employers would prefer a man come to work in an earring/s especially if they were going to be representing the company in front of clients/customers.
It may be all right to wear an earring/s in India where it is accepted but over here (UK) it portrays the wrong image and its important to respect the views of the country and time you live in rather then going to the past and the culture in a foreign country (and yes to many India is foreign).
July 18th, 2006 at 10:01 pm
A couple of points, H.
“it may be all right to wear an earring/s in India where it is accepted but over here (UK) it portrays the wrong image”
- what do you mean by the “wrong image”?
“its important to respect the views of the country and time you live in rather then going to the past and the culture in a foreign country (and yes to many India is foreign).”
- Why be conformists at all? The world doesn’t benefit from conformists. By that logic, why would you bother studying Hindu philosophy, since it is from another time and country? Why pray to Hindu divinities and participate in Hindu festivals? Personally, my article was aimed at those who used a cultural argument against wearing earrings, but regarding your point that we should adhere to the dress and style of the country where we live, that is a somewhat dry way to live - and I’m not just referring to earrings. If all people were to simply adopt the style and views of the country where they immigrate, then cross cultural enrichment, which has been of great benefit to the world, would never take place. Regarding ‘foreign’ - you should bear in mind that any brown Hindu would be considered somewhat foreign, no matter how much such an individual tried to simply forget that their past ever happened.
July 19th, 2006 at 8:29 am
Pranav - I think what i wrote has been taken out of proportion.
I was merely pointing out that here people who wear earrings are associated with the rudeboy culture, I know its a prejudice that is wrong but it is the way many think.
Many workplaces would prefer you not to wear an earring as it does not portray the right image, once again a rudeboy image.
“why would you bother studying Hindu philosophy, since it is from another time and country?”
I think this shows that you have not understood my argument. Hinduism is relevant today as it was 5000 years ago, but it has developed with time. In the same way so will our dress sense.
My argument was merely an observation and not a criticism.
July 19th, 2006 at 6:30 pm
Hey y’all
I don’t even know why there is a debate about this, everybody should be ‘each to their own’ in this matter.
dang3r0us
July 21st, 2006 at 7:20 pm
Dangerous, I think you’ve got to exactly the crux of the issue right there. The only real question for debate here is surely: should such a matter be a case of ‘to each their own’?
July 27th, 2006 at 1:12 pm
^ Totally agreed, this question is the crux of the matter:
“The only real question for debate here is surely: should such a matter be a case of ‘to each their own’?”
I would say: hell yeah.
November 12th, 2006 at 3:21 am
hey man u 100% right im watching mahabharat right now and i dnt i spelled it right but i have the same argument going on at home lol what a coincidence and i dont think i spelled coincidence right either but anyways man these other people are trying to prove u wrong but they cant because ur right about this issue take care